Focusing
on our Children
"Why
are we getting a divorce?"
by
Vicki Block, Legal Assistant
"Why
are we getting a divorce?" is a question asked by children in most households
of separated and divorcing parents. Many parents have a practiced response
to this or similar questions, but that response barely begins to help
children understand and cope with their new life patterns.
During
the period of separation and divorce, couples are working through one
of the most difficult times in their lives, emotionally, spiritually,
and financially. Yet, they are often asked to work through their personal
concerns, or put them aside, to explain and, more importantly, to show
their children ways to strengthen the family despite the physical changes
the family is undergoing.
Lee County,
which is part of the Twentieth Judicial Circuit, provides an economical,
educational opportunity for couples who are facing these challenges. Parents,
Children & Divorce, is a one-time, four-hour course that is required for
each parent of minor children to complete prior to their divorce being
granted. Despite a parent's best intentions and kindest explanations,
the reality of divorce is that parents are separated from their children
for various time periods. How the children react and adapt is a critically
important part of divorce. How it will shape their lives is, in great
part, determined by their parents' fundamental behavior and ability to
cooperate with one another.
Although
divorce marks the end of the marital commitment, it is the beginning of
an energetic re-commitment to the well-being of the children. Parents,
Children & Divorce, an interactive class, does not "tell" parents how
to raise their children. This court-ordered class addresses four goals:
- Focusing on
the children and the feelings of loss
- Improving effective
communication
- Identifying
warning signs of depression and anger
- Handling the
unique trauma children face during and after the family unit changes
It is
offered at several convenient locations, evenings and Saturdays, and the
course fee is $25, which includes the workbook. To register, call 693-8893.
To register for a course taught in Spanish, call 693-0823. Couples may
attend together, if they both agree, or call separately to register. Step-parents,
grandparents, and significant others are encouraged to register and attend;
however, children are NOT permitted in the class. A correspondence course
is also offered for those parents who live outside the Twentieth Judicial
Circuit or the State of Florida. For further information, call 1-800-767-8193.
